Everyone keeps saying self-care is so important when you’re a caregiver. And for me, at least, it’s one of the first things that gets dropped from my busy to-do list. Now that I’m back in Asheville, I decided to make attending morning water aerobics a priority. It was something that brought me so much joy when I first moved to Asheville. Being in the water, the camaraderie of the other “mermaids” (as we call ourselves), getting exercise – there was nothing not to love. No matter how tired, or stressed, or bleh I felt before class, I always felt better afterwards.
And as I drove to class this morning, I found myself crying. I couldn’t understand why I was crying when I was going to something that I love to do. Something that brings me joy.
I realized I was admitting this is the new normal. I’m not in Winston-Salem. I’m not caring for Dad. I’m back in Asheville, to my “normal” life, one in which he is no longer alive. And it was so painful I almost couldn’t stand it.
5 thoughts on “The New Normal”
Lori. Please take care of yourself. I haven’t found any helpful way to respond to your recent news … Just know that we care about you. And some of us have gone thru just the same distressing experience.
With love …
Thank you, Michael. I know this is an experience so many people go through, and yet it feels so incredibly isolating. Thank you for reaching out.
Hi Lori, loss is never easy. Whether its a common experience for others or not, this is your experience and you are getting through it and will continue to. There’s nothing natural about death and aging, not at all. However, I commend you on getting down to the why. Why you were crying and then moving forward. I can tell you’re a caring and loving daughter hopefully the day ended with some positive things to reflect on.
Sending you love and heartfelt empathy. If there’s anything we can do for you to help the offer is here and standing. Wishing you all the best.
Thank you so much, Laura. I so appreciate you reaching out and your offer to help. Hope you and your family are well! ❤