• Missing

    December 24, 2025
    Asheville Living, family

    Christmas is a hard holiday. Or rather, Christmas Eve is. It’s a day for traditions. For opening one present. For dinners with family. It’s difficult when there is no family.

    I miss Christmas Eve with Mom and Dad. I miss all of us jockeying when to fill each others’ Christmas stockings, trying to do it when no one else will notice. I miss the Moravian Lovefeast in Rural Hall culminating at midnight, singing carols, eating buns, and drinking Sanka.

    I stare in wonder at my friends who still have one, or both, of their parents. Do they realize how lucky they are? Have they any idea how much they will miss them when they’re no longer there? When traditions no longer are, because the people aren’t there to uphold them?

    3 comments on Missing
  • Witness

    December 22, 2025
    Asheville Living
    Witness

    Since the summer, my right hand has been going numb, and I drop things – books, paintbrushes, silverware, glasses. This morning I had carpal tunnel surgery. The surgeon repeatedly mentioned it was a quick surgery – 15 minutes tops. She asked if I wanted general or local anesthesia. For only 15 minutes, I didn’t want to endure the fogginess that general anesthesia brings on, sometimes for days. I chose local.

    As we entered the waiting room, she asked what music I’d like during the procedure. I chose the Hamilton soundtrack, which has gotten me through so many difficult situations before. A large needle with local anesthesia was injected into my right hand, and I went numb almost immediately. As “The Schuyler Sisters” played, I sang loudly, “We hold these truths to be self evident, that all men are created equal, and when I meet Thomas Jefferson, I’m gonna impel him to include women in the sequel. Work!” The tech told me to sing it, sister (something I’ve never heard before, and was encouraged by). They washed me in an iodine solution, and began to position a drape between my arm and my head. “Oh, no, no, no. If I’m going to be awake, I want to watch.”

    The drape needed to be there for hygienic reasons. And, she said that with each step, they would raise the drape so that I could see what was happening. I felt the incision, more like pressure than pain, and didn’t feel anything else. I asked why I didn’t feel blood spurting everywhere (I expected this after cutting into my wrist), and she said there was something in the anesthesia to stop the bleeding, and she had cauterized me. I had not smelled the singe of skin, so that surprised me. And, I was impressed.

    She snipped, and dug, and snipped some more. The incision was held open by forceps (what a wonderful tool, forceps), so it appeared more like a rectangle than a slit. She cut the ligament, to create more space for the nerve. She explained what she was doing, and where, as she did it. I saw the finished result, a lovely opening where my nerve could move freely.

    She then explained they would flush the wound, and I felt ccs of saline injected and expunging. I saw the freshly cleaned wound, and she began stitching me closed. I admired her stitches, and then she began the work of bandaging me. It felt excessive (much like Randy in A Christmas Story being bundled up to go outside in the cold), but I didn’t object. I wiggled my fingers, and she told me we were done. How lucky I am to witness such a procedure.

    9 comments on Witness
  • Nostalgia

    November 28, 2025
    Asheville Living, delight
    Nostalgia

    The most recent book to become available on Libby was Human Acts: A Novel. I started reading it last night and finished it today. Though this was not a chapter in Korean history I was familiar with, I was overcome with nostalgia for my time spent there in 2001-2002.

    Nostalgia washes over me. I remember experiencing illiteracy for the first time. I could read the hangul letters, and sound out words on signs, and had no idea what the meaning of said words were. Everything was new. Each day was an explosion of learning. How to order in a restaurant. How to pay the electric bill (at the post office?!?). How to navigate transportation systems. The kindness of strangers.

    And the seoye classes. My job as an English teacher didn’t start until 3 pm. So every morning I took seoye classes with Mr Song. Me, and seven Korean grandfathers. Seoye, or Chinese calligraphy brush painting, was something one traditionally did in retirement. But I loved the beauty of writing and art, and asked if Mr Song would allow me to take classes with him each morning. He agreed, though he spoke minimal English, and I spoke minimal Korean. Each morning, for hours, we sat at our desks, brush held at a ninety degree angle to the paper, and practiced strokes. Mr Song would often come by and place his hand over mine, coaxing my hand into the correct position to make beautiful brush strokes. I would smile and offer an enthusiastic “Khamsa-hamnida!”

    About a month into classes, the group decided that one day a month would be spent on a field trip to a cultural institution to expose me to more Korean heritage. Again, because of their limited English, and my limited Korean, I’m not sure that I understood the full depth of what they intended to impart. And I appreciated the great kindness they showed. Our first trip was “The Welcome Party.” They introduced me to black pig (delicious) and the correct way to pour and receive soju (dangerous).

    They taught me the Korean song for the 2002 FIFA World Cup, “Oh Pilseung Korea.” We sang it through the month of the World Cup, waving the Taegeukgi flag and cheering for the national team that eventually landed fourth in the tournament.

    Nostalgic, I found my bag of seoye materials in my craft room. I probably haven’t examined the materials in 20 years, yet they’ve made the move with me from apartment to condo, from San Francisco to Asheville. I took out my onion skinned practice papers. I marveled at how proficient I used to be.

    I spread the felt cloth over my dining room table. I opened my ink stone and began to grind the onyx black ink. I twisted my brush into a fine point, and began my exercises. For hours, I awkwardly practiced strokes – numbers first, then common characters such as happiness, longevity, and strength. I’ve lost the natural flow of strokes. But I haven’t lost the overwhelming feelings of calm and peacefulness as I silently place ink to paper. I’m grateful.

    2 comments on Nostalgia
  • The Call of the Pacific

    October 31, 2025
    delight, Tales of San Francisco
    The Call of the Pacific

    Hands down, the thing I miss most about living in San Francisco is the ease of connecting with friends. We still connect, through postcards, and texts, and emails, but the in person visits require a bit more coordination now that I’m on the east coast.

    What surprised me about my most recent visit is that I discovered I also *really* miss the Pacific Ocean. I had two very different, yet equally perfect, days with her this trip.

    On Saturday, we were at Ocean Beach. It was a quintessential San Francisco summer day. Cold, drizzly, and ridiculously strong winds. My legs were bare and the coarse sand pounded against my exposed skin. My loose hair whipped around my head, preventing me from always seeing. The water was rough, no surfers daring to tackle it. I love the raw power of the Pacific Ocean on days like this.

    Stormy Pacific Ocean at Ocean Beach in San Francisco

    On Wednesday, I walked along Crissy Field. A gentle breeze blew, the sun warmed my bare arms. This was San Francisco October at its best. Blue skies, gentle breeze, warm sun. The most perfect month to visit. I stopped at one of the many wooden benches overlooking the Bay. The water isn’t as rough here. I can see to Marin. Sailboats glide by. Tankers slowly make their way across. The Golden Gate Bridge stands majestically in the distance, its International Orange contrasting with the blues of the Bay and the sky. The roar of Highway One traffic is in the near background, yet feels far away. A young couple sits cross legged on a blanket in the sand not far away, facing each other with little space in between. Talking, laughing, ignoring their Husky. The Bay is the epitome of opportunities – anyone’s dream can become reality here.

    Beautiful San Francisco Bay on a sunny October day
    6 comments on The Call of the Pacific
  • Morning Fog

    October 20, 2025
    Asheville Living

    I was driving past Beaver Lake. I normally wasn’t there at this time of the morning. The fog was dense. The heron was there. I was grateful for this moment of serendipity.

    1 comment on Morning Fog
  • Happy

    October 19, 2025
    Asheville Living, delight
    Happy

    The day was perfect. Blue skies, puffy white clouds, cool temperatures. I had just come home from dance class, and sat on the front porch, rocking in my favorite chair and enjoying the moment before it dawned on me that it would be a perfect day to drive up to the Parkway. Sections that had been closed since Hurricane Helene had just reopened. I prepared some snacks and jumped into the car.

    As I drove higher and higher, I felt an overwhelming sadness. I saw evidence of the destruction Hurricane Helene had wrecked. I was grateful for the crews that had worked so hard to reopen the parkway. I was sad for all the downed trees and destruction. Both can be true all at once.

    I parked at the trailhead to Black Balsam. I bounded up the rocky path, and relished in the pristine air. I appreciated the silence. I hadn’t realized how accustomed I had grown to noise. I loved the lack of it. Silence is beautiful. Silence is restorative.

    I don’t know what they were, but the bare trees with bunches of red berries were striking. The sun over the horizon was invigorating. The red leaves rustling in the wind. All were almost too beautiful to take in. Almost.

    I sat on a rock and just was. I looked out over the mountains. I listened to the wind blowing. I felt the warmth of the sun. I appreciated the land that has been here for ages and will continue to be here for ages to come. I was content. I was happy.

    No comments on Happy
  • Three Dahlias

    September 30, 2025
    Asheville Living, delight
    Three Dahlias

    I love when it rains. There’s something about inhaling the clean air, pondering the metaphor of renewal, and the practicality of knowing I don’t have to water the garden. As an added bonus, after the rain I pick all the downed flowers for an inside bouquet.

    This morning, three beautiful pink dahlias lay in the mulch, their stems snapped by the high winds during the night. I brought them in and marveled at how different, and how spectacular, each bloom is. Three perfect dahlias.

    Dahlia one, as large as my spread hand
    Dahlia two, pink petals almost transparent
    Dahlia three, with perfectly curled petals
    1 comment on Three Dahlias
  • Delightful Encounters at JAC

    August 29, 2025
    delight, Travel
    Delightful Encounters at JAC

    The JAC TSA agents were unexpectedly kind and friendly, especially for 6:45 am. Which seems like an impossibility for me. I struggle in the morning.

    As I was retrieving my scanned bags, I noticed a speck of color on the stone wall. I stepped closer, and was delighted to see dozens of tableaus, all in miniature. A car being pursued by giant dogs. A crowned frog waiting to eat a watermelon slice. A campervan headed towards a massive rubber ducky.

    I took out my phone, and noticed the “no photographs allowed” sign. I looked around, saw an imposing TSA officer walking towards me, and asked for permission to take a photo of the wall. “Be my guest!” he boomed, smiling. A delightful way to ease into an early morning of travel.

    No comments on Delightful Encounters at JAC
  • Cotton Candy Skies

    August 28, 2025
    Asheville Living, delight
    Cotton Candy Skies

    There are evenings I glance out the window as the sun is setting and my heart skips a beat. Tonight was one of those nights. I’m overwhelmed by the beauty of cotton candy skies. The layers of pink and blue, reminiscent of the bags of layered cotton candy at state fairs. Just like real cotton candy, the skies are sweet, indulgent, and never last long.

    No comments on Cotton Candy Skies
  • Not a Delight

    August 22, 2025
    Asheville Living

    After a month in a boot, nursing a broken foot, I was finally able to place weight on my foot, and the first thing I did was go to the garden. I longed to be outside, digging in the dirt, reconnecting with the earth.

    Four hours in, I considered stopping. I was tired. I was sweaty (so sweaty). I was hungry. But just one more weed to pull.

    I suddenly felt pain on my left calf. Had I landed upon a briar? I pulled my pants leg up, and a wasp flew away. Ouch. Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch.

    I feel sorry for bumblebees. They sting you, then they die. I do not feel sorry for wasps. They sting you, and sting you, and sting you. Over and over again. This was my sign to leave the garden for the evening. This was not a point of delight.

    No comments on Not a Delight
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LoriLoo

How great would life be if we lived a little, everyday?

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    • In Memory of Jerry Eugene McLeese
 

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